burslem
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Port Vale: The Final Roll of the Dice
The transfer window has slammed shut. This is it. This is this. So, in comes Andre Gray (Andre fucking Gray! I know, it’s crackers!), two young lads from Everton, the lad from Workington whom Brady worked with at Northampton and,… Continue reading
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The Last Cry of ‘Derek I’m Gutted!!!’?
There’s a special kind of magic going on in a fanzine, and it’s a magic stitched together with pritt-stick, scissors, tippex, photocopiers, late nights and DIY stubbornness. For 26 years, Derek I’m Gutted!!! has been that magic in print for… Continue reading
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150 Years of Port Vale: A Tale from the Paddock
One hundred and fifty years ago Port Vale Football Club came into being. It has given us joy and beauty, pain and ugliness in equal measure – and we wouldn’t want it any other way. Life is always worth living… Continue reading
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Become the Beast: Jon Brady and the Machiavellian Playbook
Safety sits eleven points above us – and it’s a huge, jagged mountain to climb. And Jon Brady? He’s the man with his boots on, head down, ready to scale it. Ready to lead the way. Twentieth place in League… Continue reading
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Port Vale: Ball Number Four
Tonight the balls will rattle in the bowl and the ghosts of giant-killings will lean in close, because the FA Cup 4th round draw is upon us and Vale are still breathing. Skin in the game, knuckles scraped, after a… Continue reading
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Huddersfield Town 5-0 Port Vale: How Soon Is Now?
I don’t bother with his post‑match interviews anymore. There’s never an apology, never a hint of responsibility, never even the faintest flicker of accountability for this never‑ending horror show. Just more of the same endless nothingness. He doesn’t even look… Continue reading
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Port Vale Vs Peterborough United: All or Nothing
Peterborough Town roll into town on Saturday, fellow strugglers, albeit beginning to climb out of the dirty relegation pond, and we need to win. We absolutely need to win. And it does not matter how we do that. Because playing… Continue reading
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Cut Adrift: Vale’s December Crisis
Nobody’s doing us any favours, are they? Peterborough, Exeter, Plymouth and Blackpool have all won league games over the last two nights. We didn’t lose because it was chucking it down and Vale Park has never coped with that. The… Continue reading
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FA Cup 2nd Round: A Flicker of Light in the Gloom?
It’s FA Cup 2nd round weekend, a brief detour from the hideousness of our league situation, a chance to breathe, to galvanise, to overcome, to find some answers in this absolute shitshow of a season. We host Bristol Rovers – … Continue reading
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Port Vale: Fiddling While Rome Burns
The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.” – George Orwell After Saturday’s demoralising, utterly predictable defeat, we needed something from the club—a sign, a message, anything. Just… Continue reading
tales from the paddock 